And here we gooo :)
What an incredible month of ups and downs. The last week brought a particular joy to me as I’ve received many kind requests for coaching as a reply on an organisation wide email sent by human resources. Just imagine a coach in making who is so in love with the profession and it just seems so impossible to do it, and now that coach is suddenly given both time and opportunities required. I’ve been already thinking about changing the course of the career, shorten my contract to pursue my dream and now I have even more people wanting me as a coach then I can really take and all willing to work on themselves, just wow. I can’t wait to see where we’ll get in the upcoming months, as it is already visible just how much we all can learn from each other. It is quite thrilling and uplifting in those rainy days.
Even more thrilling as I can see myself in them, the very same struggles I’ve been through and, well, I am still wrangling with. The struggles of the quote unquote modern life, so modern in-fact that we loose ourselves in it. So modern that we are asked to perform on 100% every day and deliver results quickly, efficiently and most importantly, just be productive. The belief of companies in financial results being the motivator for our growth and in the center of their culture is breathtaking to me. Of course, there are people whose pursuit of wealth is quite visible, but even there I dare ask, is it money the real motivation or is it something else? Something a bit more internal to us. In coaching, we have to look behind the curtain of what is there on the first glance, catching glimpses of one’s true intentions and dreams. That is what makes coaching so captivating and rewarding.
Week in, I have done 3 introduction sessions with my coachees and many still awaits me. The plan was to introduce ourselves, explain what the coaching is and is not and outline the plan of the set of 12 coaching sessions. Next we had to find out, whether we are a good fit to each other. I have carved out around 25 minutes out of 45 just for what essentially is a free coaching on topic of their choosing. And, well, how did it go and what have I learned?
I always went a little bit over the given time, but only after asking whether we can spend 5 more minutes to properly close it. Always ask for permission, do not assume it is alright, ask.
Many heard about coaching, open questions, looking at the given topic from various angles and guidance. None was coached yet, but, many had experiences with psychotherapy. I guess, I am still asking myself. if that is alright or if it should be the other way around, hmmm.
Using SCARF to feel out what is the social motivation in coachees, you can also adapt your coaching questions to better suit them and avoid paths that could lead to lower engagement of their prefrontal cortex.
It really helps when you can relate to your coachees, it makes them feel better with you and trust goes up, you only have to avoid one of the biggest dangers: “Do not, do not make it about yourself.” Well, at least not too much :)
